Rocking the Second Act is still very much a work-in-progress — I’m going back, polishing, and shifting things around as I go — so thank you for reading along in real time. If you’re new, you can find all the chapters here: Chapter index.
Veronica
That morning the kitchen table was a battlefield of coffee rings, unread mail, and my doomed attempts at a calendar. I pinched the screen, swiped, jabbed a thumb at the date – only for the whole week to vanish.
“Jesus Christ,” I muttered, squinting at the blurry mess of numbers. “Where the fuck did Thursday go?”
Finn breezed past, cereal bowl in hand. He barely looked down, plucked the phone out of my fingers, tapped three times, and slid it back. Thursday had reappeared like it had never left.
“There.” He dropped onto the sofa with the grace of a cat burglar. “It’s two buttons, Mum. You make this stuff so much harder than it is.”
“Don’t start,” I warned. My brain fog was bad enough without teenage smugness.
Across the table, Lily was trying to hide a grin, chin propped on her hand.
“You’re like… an anti-wizard. Every spell you cast just makes things disappear.”
Finn snorted. “Yeah, Mum’s Hogwarts letter must’ve gone to the tech support department.”
“Ctrl-alt-deleteus!” Lily intoned, wanding her pen at me.
Finn joined in. “Wi-Finitus Maximus!”
“Spillus Coffeus!” I muttered, annoyed but not to be outdone by my spawn.
Lily was wheezing now. “Hey, Finn,” – she raised her middle finger at him – “Avardakafuckya!”
I let them have their laugh. They’d forgotten how many things they’d learned because I’d walked them through them – walking, talking, writing… wiping their own bums… but sure, two buttons, equals magic.
By the time I looked up again, Lily was hunched over her bag, stuffing in scripts and a water bottle, her knee bouncing like a jackhammer.
“Okay, so drop me at Bronwyn’s at ten, then she’s giving me a lift to the studio,” she rattled off, more to herself than me. “Callback’s at eleven, I need to sign in early, and if we hit traffic I swear to God –”
“Ten,” I echoed, jabbing clumsily at the phone again. The numbers swam. I stabbed at what I thought was the right box, only to have the whole month leap forward. “Shit. Where did February come from?”
“Mum.” Lily’s voice was tight. “Please. This is important.”
I looked up. Her face was pale, eyes wide – not angry, just wound so tight I could hear the snap coming. She’d auditioned for stuff before, but this was the first professional production she’d gone for.
A beat of silence hung there. “Bronwyn said I should go for the role,” she blurted. “She told the group they’d be looking for new talent, and now if I’m late they’ll think I can’t even get my shit together.”
“You’ll be on time,” I said quickly, putting the phone down before I broke it. “We’ll make sure of it.”
She slumped back in her chair, chewing her lip, eyes darting to the clock on the wall.
Finn slouched deeper into the sofa, crunching loudly. “You know, you might not even need to show up to this audition.”
Lily shot him a glare. “Why?”
He smirked at me over his spoon. “Because everyone at school’s already seen Mum and Bronwyn going feral to Cherry Gasoline. So, you’re famous by association. Viral, Mum. Proper viral. Someone clipped it, stuck it on TikTok, and now half the Year Twelves are calling you the Cringe Aunties.”
I groaned into my coffee. “Christ.”
Lily went crimson, but she couldn’t help laughing. “Mum. Do you have to humiliate me like this?”
“Wasn’t exactly planned,” I muttered.
Finn leaned back, enjoying himself. “Don’t worry, Lil. It’s not all bad – apparently Midnight Ashes’ streams are up due to that movie with Mum’s girl crush in it.”
I rolled my eyes. “Hannah Overton is not my girl crush, thank you very much.”
Finn ignored me. “Which is hilarious, considering you tortured us with Midnight Ashes’ stuff on repeat every road trip from like, ages six to… last week.”
He swiped his phone and played the clip at me.
“You actually slay, Mum,”
That flicker of pride crossed his face before he buried it under another grin. “Guess we’re basically a rock ’n’ roll dynasty now. Should probably start charging people for autographs.”
Lily hurled a scrunched-up napkin at his head. “Shut up. This is exactly why I can’t be late today. If they Google me and see that clip, I’ll look like a joke before I even walk in the door.”
She was still laughing, but I could see the nerves as she stood, ready to go.
“Relax,” I said quickly, reaching for my bag. “We’ll get you there on time.”
Finn looked up as we made to leave, cheeky grin dialled up to 11. “Hey, Lil, ‘Avardakafuckaya,”
I sighed, half laughing as I grabbed the keys. Chaos, caffeine, and sweary spellcasting – the family crest, apparently.


Wakes up. Sees new chapter loaded. Perfect Thursday morning surprise 🤩👌🏿
I loved the Harry Potter spell riffs, and then “Avardakafuckaya” --> bahaha. Now that’s the type of Hogwarts (Hogfarts?! Look at me absolutely bombing a joke) I would attend.
Lily being so stressed about the audition while simultaneously dying of embarrassment over the viral video… poor kid just wants to be taken seriously, and her mum’s out there being a total “Cringe Auntie.” 😂